Five Ways to Accidentally Shame a Husband
February 18th, 2008 by Mrs. Fussypants
Dr. Robinson’s book, Hot Monogamy, of which we have discussed before. Is full of information gleaned from research from over 1,500 couples. A common theme that researchers found was the shame that men feel from the words spoken by their wives. The whole concept of men being sensitive to any feeling of being ’shamed’ by wives was foreign to me. I have my own hot buttons and ’shame’ is not one of them.
I had never considered that this feeling could be so common in modern marriages. Due to the overwhelming response of men in the research I feel compelled to explore it here at MarriageHacks.
Here are five ways men reported feeling dishonored by their wives-
1) Not including him in making important decisions.
“I told my sister we would vacation with them this year.”
2) Correcting him when he speaks.
“No Dear, it was last May, not June.”
3) Doing things that he is capable of.
“Oh, don’t bother. I’ll do it myself.”
4) Not placing importance on his needs.
“I know you are tired, but You have to…..”
5) Questioning his judgment
“You aren’t really going to ____, are you?”
After I examined my own behavior for the last week, I was a bit shocked. Seems I do many of these things with disturbing regularity. Interesting how I treated my husband in a way I would never accept from him. Luckily I have a whole site dedicated to strengthening marriage to keep me on my toes!
My challenge to you this week is to simply observe your interactions with your husband. Like me, do you ever treat him in a way that would make you call him on the carpet?
To be continued with the Extraordinary Wives.
This is part of Shannon’s WFMW!